Outline
- Introduction
- The Implication of Our Choices
- Is “Everyone Is Doing it” Wrong?
- The Answer to “Why Not Me?”
- How Do We Play Safe?
- Conclusion
Introduction
Alhamdulillah infinitely. All praise and thanks are due to the Almighty Allah. I send peace and blessings upon Ḥabībī Muḥammad, his household, his companions and all those who follow his guided path till judgement day.
This is the fourth and last article for the “Everyone is doing it… Why not me?” series. The first article presented the incident, which occurred to Sayyidinā ‘Umar raḍiya Allāhu ‘anhu at the market, and led him to learn a unique du’a and a great wisdom. The second article defined the majority and highlighted its characteristics and the influence it poses on the minority within the context of the article. The third article defined the minority and then discussed its Uniqueness, Virtues and Challenges.
Today’s article discusses the implication of our choices in life as Muslims. It explains where the “everyone is doing it” statement is flawed, and then provides an answer to the “why not me?” question. The article concludes with a call to action extracted from the teachings of the Prophet, ṣallā Allāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam. This call to action serves as a suggestion to the solution to how we can play safe while dealing with the challenges we encounter as Muslims.
The Implication of Our Choices
With regards to our purpose of existence in this life, we have a divinely revealed book that guides us in our journey towards the next life. This guide remains as such, whether we follow it or not. However, failure to follow it means choosing to follow the masses, which are likely to lead one astray from the path, which leads to Allah. The second article of this series concluded that the majority (mostly) leads to that which displeases Allah. This is although; Allah has shown each of us the way to Him, only that He has also given us the right of choice. He also informed us the implication of these choices. These choices are either good or bad. This is what the Qur’an says in Surah al-Insān, 2-3:
إِنَّا خَلَقْنَا الْإِنسَانَ مِن نُّطْفَةٍ أَمْشَاجٍ نَّبْتَلِيهِ فَجَعَلْنَاهُ سَمِيعًا بَصِيرًا ﴿٢﴾ إِنَّا هَدَيْنَاهُ السَّبِيلَ إِمَّا شَاكِرًا وَإِمَّا كَفُورًا ﴿٣﴾ـ
“We created man from a drop of mingled fluid so that We might try him; We gave him hearing and sight; We showed him the way, whether he be grateful or ungrateful.
Since this life is meant for test, there are rewards for what everyone attains in the test. For that, Allah says in Sūrah al-An‘ām: 160:
مَن جَاءَ بِالْحَسَنَةِ فَلَهُ عَشْرُ أَمْثَالِهَا، وَمَن جَاءَ بِالسَّيِّئَةِ فَلَا يُجْزَىٰ إِلَّا مِثْلَهَا وَهُمْ لَا يُظْلَمُونَ
“Whoever does a good deed will be repaid tenfold, but those who do a bad deed will only be repaid with its equivalent and they shall not be wronged..”
In spite of this, we, the children of Ādam, are concerned about what the majority may think or say. Therefore, we likely take the direction preferred by the majority. We choose the flavours that the majority recommends. We like what the majority favours and reject what the majority disfavours. Lo and behold! Allah warns us in the Qur’an (al-An’ām, 116):
وَإِن تُطِعْ أَكْثَرَ مَن فِي الْأَرْضِ يُضِلُّوكَ عَن سَبِيلِ اللَّـهِ، إِن يَتَّبِعُونَ إِلَّا الظَّنَّ وَإِنْ هُمْ إِلَّا يَخْرُصُونَ
“If you obey the majority of those on earth, they will lead you astray from Allah's way. They follow nothing but conjecture. They are only guessing.”
No doubt, the way of Allah is none but the truth. And when people (the majority) want to keep you away from it, will they try to manipulate it, not knowing that, Allah has created it in a way that it can be manipulated. Also, Allah is the truth. Thus, following His path means following the truth. And any perceived truth that doesn’t lead to Allah needs to reviewed, for it carries hidden flaws. This is why there are lots of ways that can lead one to go astray, but there is only one path, that leads to Him. Also, the heavens and the earth remain safe because the truth remains unmanipulated. In Sūrah al-Mu'minūn, 71, Allah says:
وَلَوِ اتَّبَعَ الْحَقُّ أَهْوَاءَهُمْ لَفَسَدَتِ السَّمَاوَاتُ وَالْأَرْضُ وَمَن فِيهِنَّ، بَلْ أَتَيْنَاهُم بِذِكْرِهِمْ فَهُمْ عَن ذِكْرِهِم مُّعْرِضُونَ
“If truth had followed their whims and desires, heavens and earth and all that lives in them would have been brought to devastate. Rather We have brought them their Reminder. Yet they keep avoiding their Reminder.
SubhanAllah… This verse implies that the everyone should follow the truth, as it doesn’t follow anyone. And we have full control and right over our choices in making the decision to follow the truth. This decision has to be wise. It’s wise when it’s based on seeking to attain His ultimate pleasure. No one, but you, yourself, can tell, when one is doing it to attain His pleasure.
Is “Everyone Is Doing it” Wrong?
Today, everyone is doing the same thing, because they see everyone else doing that same thing. Everyone is doing the same thing because the media is showing us, or let me say, the media is dictating on us to do the same thing.
This is so because (I guess) we try to live up to the expectations of others, and in the process we overlook our purpose in life and what has brought us here, and why we are here.
What is wrong with “everyone is doing it” is that, as Muslims, our compass of life should be clear, that no matter what, one can be self-sufficient with it, if only he puts his trust in Allah, without the need to use others’ compass of life. How would one neglect his compass and embark on someone else’s route? If you both departed from different locations, and bounce into each other along the way, there’s possibility that you are not both targeting the same destination. Why then would one trust someone else’s compass more than his own?
Only put your trust in someone else’s compass if its destination is the same as yours. But remember that people can change their mind at any time.
The Answer to “Why Not Me?”
“Why not me?” is the question we usually ask in protest against the good advice that our loved ones might have extended to us. As easy as it is to be raised, it’s also damaging and unhealthy. It keeps our loved ones away, and enlarges our egos. A parent may find this answer to be rude if his child responds to him that way. But hold on for a moment dear parent…
Let one take his child for an example…
The child sees other children in the television; at his school, or even in the street use F-words. He sees them imitating adults (other than you) in telling lies. He sees them engrossed in music and all that, which music leads to. Wouldn’t it be strange for him that you, even if you’re his parent, to tell him of doing otherwise?
This child has grown up as a teenager. He continues to see his peers at school exchanging what they perceive as (or what they are made to perceive as) love. They hang out. They chill. They date. The less they pay attention to is studies and morality. How then, would you, even if you’re his parent, want to tell him to conduct himself otherwise? More badly, no one cares of the growing number of single mothers in the Muslim communities. These single mothers also, mostly, end up as school drop-outs. But when a teen couple decided to get married and get out of unlawful affairs, the UN had verged in to complain about too much of such cases happening in Malaysia! You see! Since when has the UN been providing practical and effective solutions to Muslims pertaining to motherhood and morality?
This child (the teenager) matures further, and graduates from a tertiary institution. He’s started working, and has been assigned to tasks overseas. This involves him in frequent trips abroad. Anytime he checks-in to a hotel, he’ll be offered sex service. If he declines (and this is a sign he’s a good Muslim), he would be told, “everyone is doing it, why wouldn’t you?” Since everyone is doing it, how would you want to advise him the otherwise? And now that he’s a grown-up, how can you offer him a piece of advice?
This same child of yours (now an adult and matured) goes to his workplace with a pure and clean heart to serve, only to find that no one at the workplace serves from heart. When he enquires, he’s simply told, “This is how everyone is doing it. Why can’t you?” Now, how would you possibly convince him to do it different from others?
If this happens to one through (almost all) his growth stages, his choices become based on what others have influenced on him. As a result…
… As a result, we live in a time when everyone is playing with gadgets and toys. We own iPhones, Android devices, and all types of devices, not because we need it, but simply because everyone is holding one. If this is true, in the case of your child, why can’t he too?
As a result… Our women are into fashion as never before. Once a model appears on the screen with a semi-naked fashion, the next day, it will be altered into a transparent jubbah, and a Muslimah will be donning it. Is it wrong? I’m not sure. But I ask myself in wonder; if Sayyidah ‘Āishah or Sayyidah Fāṭimah raḍiya Allāhu ‘anhumā were around today, would they go for it? I thought they are the role models for our Muslimahs. Aren’t they?
… As a result, we live in a time when everyone is determined to eat what the media portrays to be healthy; even when it’s actually not. We all know that fast foods, i.e. McDonalds, KFC, Burger King and the likes are unhealthy. Yet, we are obsessed with them. Since we are obsessed with them, our mothers no longer cook at home. Why cook, when fast food outlets are ready to deliver to our doorstep? Everyone is doing it… and everyone is having the same sicknesses.
The point is, everyone may be doing it, but we Muslims can’t do it, if it goes against the commands of Allah. We do it, when it pleases Allah or does not invite His anger, even if no one is doing it. It’s not wrong to learn from others; Muslims and non-Muslims. But when we learn, it’s important to activate our ability to differentiate between good, which we are ought to embrace, and bad which we are ought to reject and dispose.
How Do We Play Safe?
“It’s easy said than done.” This is a famous statement, and I will agree with you, if you too said so. But the difficulty in doing something is not enough an excuse for one to give up to devils. A Muslim must remember that he’s in the protection of Allah, as long as he continues to seek protection from Him. He’s continuously guided, as long as he continues to seek guidance from Him. That’s why we pray and supplicate almost in every single moment in the life of the Muslim. Therefore, one has to always remember his Islamic (not Muslim) identity. With that in mind, he can easily put the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad ṣallā Allāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam at practice. The Prophet ṣallā Allāhu ‘alaihi wa sallam said in a ḥadīth reported by Imām al-Tirmidhī:
لا تَكُونُوا إِمَّعَةً؛ تَقُولُونَ: إِنْ أَحْسَنَ النَّاسُ أَحْسَنَّا، وَإِنْ ظَلَمُوا ظَلَمْنَا. وَلَكِنْ وَطِّنُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ؛ إِنْ أَحْسَنَ النَّاسُ أَنْ تُحْسِنُوا، وَإِنْ أَسَاءُوا فَلا تَظْلِمُوا
“Do not be blind followers, who say, “If people do good, we too would do good. And if they oppress, we too would oppress.” Instead, free your selves; when people do good, so should you, and when they do bad, you should avoid their bad deeds.”
On that note al-Fuḍail ibn ‘Iyāḍ says,
اُسْلُكْ سَبِيلَ الهُدَى، وَلاَ يَضُرُّكَ قِلَةُ السَّالِكِينَ. وَإِيَّاكَ وَطُرُقَ الضَّلالَةِ، وَلا تَغْتَرَّ بِكَثْرَةِ الهَالِكِينَ
“Take the path of guidance, and do not be distracted by the scarceness of those following that path. Beware of the paths of misguidance, and do not be deceived by the crowds of those perishing.”
One should also have a constant reminder for himself, based on the verse of Sūrah Yūsuf, 103, where Allah says:
وَمَا أَكْثَرُ النَّاسِ وَلَوْ حَرَصْتَ بِمُؤْمِنِينَ
“Yet most men will not become believers, no matter how eager you may be.”
This means, yes, everyone may be doing it, but none of them is responsible for you. None of them shall answer on your behalf. Even if any of them instigates you into wrongdoing, it’s only you, who shall answer for yourself.
Conclusion
Following the truth is the only way that leads to Allah. Thus, the truth is therefore prescribed by Allah Himself. However, we are given the right of choice (with implication) between following the truth or falsehood. Whether one chooses the truth or falsehood, there’s a price for him to pay. Some will start paying the price for their choices in this life. But the full price will surely be paid, when rewards are disseminated in their hereafter.
The objective of this series was to present sample verses from the Qur’an which discusses the majority (of people) and the minority in the contrary. This series also aimed to help the Muslim reader to realize that he is worth more than just living and following others blindly, without allowing himself to reason before embarking on his choices in life. After all, in the hereafter, only he will stand to answer for himself, a fact that should create enough awareness for him to make his choices responsibly.
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Allāh knows best.
Allāhu Ḥāfiẓ 
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